This week, I feel like I should just start telling people the truth again.
Not that I’ve necessarily been lying but many times I just avoid the entire
conversation surrounding some of my truths.
For one, I don’t necessarily hate my ex. We’re friends. Don’t know that we
could be more but I’ll honestly say that we’re cool. Many times, he pisses
me off and that’s when my venting sessions begin but for about 85% of the
time, we are not only civil but we enjoy each other for the most part.
Then there’s this one guy that got away, twice. I have a hard time saying it
like I mean it to the men in my life. There is this one guy that has gotten
away twice. There hasn’t been a reason either time, we just like time pass
without contacting but when we resume, we pick up right where we left off. I
wish I could make it right. Not so that we can be together but because, he
is probably the most enjoyable ride of my life (thus far). I think all women
should have a person that teaches them about themselves and about life and I
found that in him. I just pray that the man that I marry is about the same
Then there’s the last fool. Love him to death, but I hate the decisions that
he makes for himself. Mostly with his talents but largely with his women.
Neither of those things am I willing to change because that’s a change that
has to be made within himself. You know how you are told to love others in
spite of? Well that’s our relationship and my love is definiely at a
And then there’s the relationship that needs some act right. Up until about
6 years ago, this was my best friend of sorts. Definitely not the
relationship that people would describe they wanted but we grew up together
and made it work. Now my mom is pushing for us to fix it and I honestly
don’t know where it went wrong. I don’t want to talk about the past, I just
want the man that I argued, laughed and ate Chinese food with back. If for
nothing but those three things, I can swallow my pride. No apologies or
confrontation needed. Just a plate of shrimp fried rice, a Corvette drive
through the hood and I think it would all be right again.
I guess some mending needs to begin.